Thursday, September 3, 2015

This Too Shall Pass

You know, when life throws you lemons?
Well, let me tell you about shitty days.
They start like this:
Woke up at 6:00am by baby boy, who's diaper is filled at capacity with a blowout. Awesome! 
I can barely keep my eyes open, because I've had (maybe!) 4 hours of sleep. And these are cumulative mind you, not consecutive... I change his diaper, we exchange some pleasantries, and just as I close the last snap on his onesie PHLPFFFFLLLPPDFLLPFPPPaaaaargh.... 
Oh joy, he got to fill a clean diaper, just the way he likes it... (Insert giant eye roll here)

At this point, the 3yr old is already up, bright-eyed and bushy tailed, placing very specific breakfast demands. Little miss wants poached eggs on hash browns, with toast. 

I suddenly remember that I must wake the teen up for high school registration today. She's pissed, of course, because getting up at 7:00am sucks after impersonating Rip Van Winkle all summer. She just doesn't understand that it'll take time to get herself, her sister, and her brother fed, dressed, ready and out the door. Oh wait, ME TOO!! 

And we're walking, because we don't have a vehicle. Not too bad, it's only 15 minutes at most. But it's hot.

By the grace of all the Gods, the baby decides to go back to sleep. This gives me a window to make breakfast - tater tots & fried eggs, don't judge me! - and a small pot of French Press coffee. I swear, I run entirely on fumes and coffee these days... 
I literally inhale my breakfast, because I know my window to get ready is shrinking faster than a snowball in the hot August sun. I rush through a five minute face (BB Cream, a stroke of concealer under each eye - because my bags have bags! - a touch of cream blush, a swipe of cream eyeshadow, eyebrows and mascara), and then try and find something appropriate to wear that is both cute and is nursing friendly, without making me look like an adult entertainer. This is a seriously challenging feat.

I try one wrap dress, only to find that the slightest movement opens the collar up and reveals my bra in its entirety. Something I'm sure the teenage boys at the high school wouldn't mind, but I do. So I reach for one of my trusty "Nana" dresses. Covers everything that needs covering, but still cute.
I finish filling all the forms that should have been filled back in July but weren't, cause I've been a tad busy. 
The kids are fed, dressed, and ready to go. I carry our awesome Phil&Teds double stroller down our front steps, and come back in, only to find that Baby Boy needs a fresh diaper. Ok, I can do this. Rush to the bedroom, change the diaper, aaaand he's hungry. I got this too, I whip out a quick snack for the boy, until I can tell he's full. And just as I'm about to pull him over my shoulder for a burp, he spews. No, I mean like something from the Exorcist. All over himself, my bed, AND my dress! 
The toddler's whining that she wants to get going, so is the teen. Ok, change the baby's clothes, wipe my dress with a wet cloth, and out we go, making sure I've got all the paperwork & money needed for registration. 

I get the baby in the back seat of the stroller, plop the toddler in the front, and breathe a sigh of relief, cause we are ready to GO! 

Then nothing. I look down, and one of the rear tires on the stroller is flat. This thing is brand spanking new! I run back up the front stairs, rush to the basement for s tire pump, Rush back up, out the door, lock it, and get started pumping that tire. Phew, it's working. Put the valve cap back on, drop the stroller on it, and PFFFFFFTTTTTT!!!! All the air comes out. At this point, a string of beautifully colourful French words start streaming from my mouth. I try again. Same thing. 

This stroller is We've had it for a week! 
Have I mentioned it's hotter than Hades out there? Now the toddler starts complaining that she wants to go, the baby starts crying, probably from the incredible heat, and the teen is looking at me like "What do I do now?!" 
I make the Teen call her friend up and beg for a ride from her mom. There's no way we're going to make it. I'm on the verge of tears, feeling like an absolute failure, because despite thinking I had it all under control, the shit still hit the fan. 

So now, I sit here, in my dark bedroom, trying not to crumble in tears while nursing our infant son, begging our Toddler to please wait until I'm done nursing her brother and I will get her a snack, and no, she can't go outside to dig in the dirt, and please, PLEASE wait until I'm done, and I will help her change into different clothes. 

Teen girl has been picked up & dropped off, and is waiting in a huge lineup to get registered for one of the greatest stages of her life, and I'm missing it. I wanted to be there to support and help guide her. But now she's on her own. Perhaps it's for the best, I mean, I know she would've preferred to have me there, but now she'll be with her best friend, and it'll likely be much more memorable for her that way. 

And on a positive note, I just got off the phone with P&T's customer service, and they will send us a brand new tire for the stroller. And that just relieved a bit of the stress that was building up.

Nap time is here, and hopefully both little cooperate, and nap together so I can join in. :)

TTFN Dolls!
Tomorrow is another day 😊

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